


We Keep This Love in a Photograph

by bloopmichael



Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: I didn’t know how to format it so that the past and present are distinctly different, Long Distance Relationships, M/M, Memories, a lil bit of angst, a lil bit of fluff, basically a combination of the two, cute boyfriends, flashbacks/reflection on the past, it’s mostly dialogue, ok im done now, so watch out for that, switches between the past and the present often so pay attention, this is pretty short sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-20
Updated: 2018-01-20
Packaged: 2019-03-07 09:32:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13431903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bloopmichael/pseuds/bloopmichael
Summary: “Wait for me to come home,” Michael reassured the sobbing boy over the phone, trying to make his voice sound comforting but he was just as pained as Luke.“But you are my home, Michael.”





	We Keep This Love in a Photograph

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone I wrote this in like 4 hours but somehow only managed to get about 2k words written?? Anyway I had this idea while listening to Photograph by Ed Sheeran and just wanted to write it so I could get it out of my head. (That means it’s not proofread) Read it if ya like angst/fluff or muke :)
> 
> (Also see if you can spot the Carry On lyric in there, along with lyrics from Photograph)

“ _How are you feeling?_ ”

Michael’s voice brings Luke back to reality from his own mind, which was swimming with confusion and disbelief.

“How could you do this to me? To us?” Luke manages to get out, his voice now shaky because of his emotions. 

“Baby, please. I don’t have a choice. I’m sorry,” Michael answers in a sorrowful tone, but it’s not enough for Luke.

Michael explained the reasoning behind the situation and the purpose of his trip a million times, but to Luke it all sounded the same: _he’s leaving, he’s going to be gone._

Luke remains silent, so Michael tries another attempt at comforting his boyfriend. “Long distance isn’t that bad, you know? We can do it.”

“You really think so?” Luke asks in a quiet voice. 

“I do. We’ll make it through, just like we always do,” Michael reassures Luke, cupping his face gently to wipe a tear away from the boy’s crystalline blue eyes with his thumb. 

***

That night, Luke could barely sleep. He remembers being wide awake with Michael right next to him, his mind flooded with bad thoughts and senseless worries. 

_Not much has changed since then._

Now that Michael’s gone, the late nights have only gotten worse. Luke’s thoughts always seem to keep him up for too long, making his days even more miserable. All that made him feel _alive_ anymore were the few moments Michael was able to spare over the phone, but even those were barely enough to keep Luke hanging on.

After over an hour of trying but failing to fall asleep, Luke decides to take a walk. In a matter of minutes he’s out of his bed and on the street, trailing down the sidewalks of the neighborhood he and Michael bought a house together in. 

It was a huge moment for the both of them. Never had they dreamed of being able to do something so special for themselves, something that solidified their relationship even more. Luke already knew he wanted to spend every day of his life with Michael, and owning a place they could live in together only made him more confident in his love for his boyfriend.

But now the house felt incredibly _empty_. Being without Michael made Luke feel empty himself.

He continued walking through the dimly light neighborhood, his eyes shifting from his feet treading on the smooth pavement to the rows of houses on the block, each filled with people who were undoubtedly sleeping. All Luke could think about was how happy and warm the houses probably felt, knowing there were people inside who were in love and who loved each other. Who were there to hold one another close and be together how ever much they pleased.

“ _That sounds so stupid,_ ” Luke thought. _“Houses don’t have feelings, you idiot.”  
_

Luke could usually find solace in his own mind but the voice inside his head was as dull as ever and only seemed to make him feel worse. He spent so much of his time wrapped up in depressing thoughts, and that didn’t seem to change no matter his surroundings. Nonetheless, he kept his legs moving and his mind trained on his feelings, determined to be able to clear his mind _for good_ after this small journey. 

Instead of looking at the houses on the street, Luke went back to keeping his gaze tilted downward at the sidewalk below his feet. In his peripheral vision, he could clearly see the locket hanging from his neck bouncing on his chest lightly from the movements his body was making. 

_The necklace Michael got him for his sixteenth birthday._

It had only been 2 years since they had met for the first time, originally hating each other but soon getting over it. The two boys were best friends, though Luke had caught feelings for the boy with messy hair and a knack for video games very quickly. It was initially a difficult thing for him to accept; he spent several nights of his early teenage years crying himself to sleep, telling himself that he shouldn’t feel that way about _boys_. Especially when that boy was Michael Clifford, who was just his friend and would never think of him as anything more.

Then came July 16th, and just when Luke thought he’d never show up, Michael appeared outside of his house, timidly waiting for him by the front door. Luke swiftly ran down the stairs from his bedroom to meet Michael, assuming that his best friend had finally come over to hang out, since it was his birthday after all. When Luke opened the door he was greeted by the same boy he expected, though looking much more nervous than usual. 

Michael mumbled a string of words that resembled a _”happy birthday”_ as he handed Luke the small box he was holding in his shaky hands, a glint of embarrassment but hopefulness in his emerald eyes. Luke slowly opened the box to find a long, silver necklace carefully placed inside. The design was simple; a chain looped through an oval shaped locket. The piece of jewelry glimmered in the Australian sunset and Luke popped the locket open to find a picture of them both inside, one he recalled taking not long ago. 

Luke blushed gratefully and thanked him for the gift, causing a shy smile to form on Michael’s face. He was just about to ask him if he wanted to come inside so they could celebrate his birthday together when Michael leaned forward and pressed a rushed kiss to Luke’s cheek, heat rising to the spot his lips so gently touched. Michael practically bolted away from Luke’s house afterwards, too scared to stick around after making such a bold move. 

Luke found himself spending yet another night thinking of Michael, but not because he was troubled by his forbidden crush on the boy. All he could do was smile when he remembered how cute Michael looked nervous, especially when he knew that he had caused it _himself._ Michael even _kissed_ him before he left, something Luke dreamt about often but couldn’t believe had come true. And now he had a pretty locket around his neck, right next to his heartbeat, _exactly where Michael should be._ From then on Luke vowed to hold on to that memory forever, keeping it deep within his soul. 

A tear falls from Luke’s eyes as he admires the locket, holding it in front of him. He opens the silver oval just like he did for the first time many years ago, finding the awkward but endearing photo of him and his beloved boyfriend. 

_It only reminded him of yet another bitter memory._

It had felt like ages had passed but truthfully it was only a few weeks ago when Luke saw Michael for the last time before he had to depart. Luke told himself he’d be able to keep his emotions together but was unable to keep that promise when he began sobbing into Michael’s chest and clutching to his body, as if it meant he wouldn’t actually go. 

“I know, baby, I know. I don’t want me to leave either,” Michael said while holding Luke, his tattooed arms wrapping him in a comforting embrace. 

He let Luke get his tears out before pulling away to reach for something in his pocket. “Here. I want you to have this.”

Michael hands Luke a photo of the two of them, similar to the one he had received inside of a silver locket years ago. In the photo they looked much older, and much _better_ to say the least. Luke doesn’t feel he looks that much different since he met Michael, all he’s done is grow a bit taller and finally lose his fringe. But Michael only seems to get prettier with each day, even throughout all the crazy colors he’s dyed his hair and the new inked additions he’s added to the pale skin of his arms and hands. 

Luke grins as he looks up from the photo and into Michael’s eyes. 

“It’s supposed to be symbolic,” Michael explains with a fond smile before continuing. “You see, photographs capture memories. And in this photo, we can keep _us_. In this photograph, our eyes are never closing. Time’s frozen, forever. It’s everlasting, just like our love.”

Luke sheds another tear from his eye, biting his lip because he can’t stop smiling. “How’d I get so lucky to have such a romantic boyfriend?”

“Only romantic for you, my love,” Michael flirts and grabs Luke’s hand to press a delicate kiss to his knuckles. 

Even though they’ve been dating for years, Michael still manages to make Luke’s heart flutter each time he compliments him. He shows Michael his gratitude by smashing their lips together, carelessly kissing his boyfriend in front of the crowds of people packed inside of the airport. 

Luke pulls away to whisper a _“thank you”_ on Michael’s soft lips. His boyfriend responds by tugging him into another kiss, this time rougher, his hands trailing down Luke’s back. 

This time Michael’s the one to end the kiss. “You’re welcome. So,” he pauses, “now that you have that photo, you can keep _me_ -“ he gently takes the glossy film from Luke’s grasp- “inside the pocket of those ripped jeans your ass looks so cute in-“ he smirks and slips his hand down to slide the photograph into the back pocket of Luke’s jeans- “and you won’t ever be alone. Okay?”

Luke bites his lip again, a warm blush rising to his face. “I love you,” he sighs.

_“I love you too, angel.”_

Now Luke’s sobbing as he reaches the only place he cares about anymore in this city, where his future with Michael really began.

He tries to quiet his cries as he gets his phone out, dialing the only number he’s ever cared enough to memorize by heart. 

“Hey, baby. What are you doing still up? It’s late,” Michael’s voice fills Luke’s ears.

“I’m at the lamppost,” Luke says and looks to the structure next to him, the painted metal illuminated by the yellow beam shining from the top of the light at the end of the street. 

“Sixth street?”

“Yeah. Right at the same exact spot you kissed me on our first date. Do you remember that?”

“Of course I remember that. But why are you there right now? You should be asleep, Luke.”

Luke rolls his eyes but knows Michael’s just expressing his concern for him. “I couldn’t fall asleep. Just like I can’t every single night you’re not here.”

The phone goes silent except for a small sigh Luke can barely hear. “I’m sorry. God, Luke, I’ve said it so many times but _I’m sorry._ ”

“I know. I am too. I just miss you,” Luke murmurs carefully, trying to keep his choked sobs from escaping. 

“I miss you too, love. I’ll be back before you know it, okay? You should really go back home, it’s not safe for you to be out this late alone.”

Luke doesn’t say anything for a moment, trying to process Michael’s response and deciding whether or not he could hold himself back from saying something he knew he’d regret. 

“Do you even care?” He whimpers. 

“What? Is everything okay, baby?”

The tears start falling again and Luke can’t help but tell Michael everything, all the pathetic feelings he’s had and all the terrible things he’s thought.

“I just... I don’t know how much longer I can do this, Michael. I’m so tired of not sleeping, I’m so tired of being sad all the time, and I’m just- I’m done with feeling like this. I can’t do it anymore. I can’t,” he cries, whining as he vents to his boyfriend over the phone. 

“Yes you can. I know you can. Luke, you can do this, okay? We’ll get through this. Everything will be fine again soon, I promise. Wait for me to come home,” Michael reassured the sobbing boy over the phone, trying to make his voice sound comforting but he was really just as pained as Luke.

_“But you are my home, Michael.”_

Luke can hear Michael crying quietly to himself now, and he hates himself for it because this is what he always does; he always seems to upset people just because he’s miserable.

“Luke, please. You have to hold on, hold on for me, hold on for _us_. It won’t be long, you know it’s gonna get better.”

“No it won’t, Michael. It’s just not the same. I don’t feel the same anymore and-“

“Luke,“ this time Michael lets out a sob too, “Luke, please. Don’t say that.”

In only seconds, Luke’s mood seemed to shift completely. He was still upset, he was still frustrated with his relationship’s current predicament. But he had come to a realization, almost like a wave washing over him, causing him to feel something he can only describe as _numbness_.

“Hey, you know that saying ‘if you love something let it go?’”

“ _Luke_ -“

“I think that’s what I should do right now. At least for the moment.”

“Luke, _please_ , just give me a second to-“

“Maybe when you get back we can do this again. Tonight all I wanted was to clear my mind, I guess this is my way of doing that. Goodbye, Michael.”

Luke ends the call quickly, ignoring Michael’s pleas from the other end. He turns his phone off, slipping it into his pocket and begins walking back home from the way he came.

_He didn’t want to wait around for Michael anymore._

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the abrupt ending, I feel like it wasn’t detailed/long enough. I also wish i could’ve written more of this fic but I just wanted to get it over with, so this is all I have for now. Thank you for reading!!


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